This is amazing!!! Powerfully written, it draws you in and won’t let go. I loved how the LGBTQIA+ characters and families are portrayed as normal, rather than something to get hung up on. It gave me hope, so thank you for that. I can't wait for more!! (I mean, I can, don't burn yourself out, but I’ll be waiting with bated breath.)
Hi Hopelight2000! Thank you so much for the kind words about the writing!!
I've been so entrenched into LGBTQIA+ media, that the overwhelmingly positive response to the "gay dads" and similar genuinely baffled me! For all the inclusivity and diversity within interactive fiction, the community is both very progressive but also flawed. I am very happy that readers adore that characters are naturally and casually queer in my story, as much as it saddens me that it's not more common!
I'd written paragraphs more, but I will stop myself here, haha! :) I have a lot of thoughts on the story's setting and its attitude towards gender and sexuality, but I'll keep those for a future date.
Thank you so much for supporting my work! I would love nothing more but to please you with another update, believe me!! Much love!
I keep telling myself, stop playing the in-development ones, they're too good. Did I listen? No, of course not, don't ever take my advice (there's a little paradox for you). This has one of the deepest stories of all the interactive fiction games I've ever played, and that is quite the achievement. Your work is absolutely brilliant, author, and I give a massive round of applause for everyone who contributed!
Hi Egel_Wegel! I am very sorry to have been a source of great distress to you -- I personally barely have the heart and stomach to support WIPs but end up getting swept into it anyway...!
I truly appreciate all your kind works, and that is such extremely high flattery that I struggle to believe you on it! Cheers!
Ha! If you doubt yourself, maybe I should post some of my work just to show you a comparison! This game is awesome, also don't worry about distressing me lol, I'm always over it in two minutes and eagerly awaiting the rest of the story :]
what a great start to a story, I enjoyed it a lot and am figuratively starving for more :> -insert a whole bunch of raving about all the great things people before me have already pointed out-
I have a few questions and "critiques" after that (more like minor wishes).
Questions:
1. "This game will be free to play in its entirety" - I assume this is a passion project of yours, is / will there be any way to support you?
Whether that be financially, with art or fan-art, maybe even emotionally showing support.
(I wouldn't even know how to 'donate' here on itch without the download popup, which is not on your site)
2. Is there any way to keep updated with the progress and/or release notifications/reminders?
(I tried joining the discord but the link seems to be dead, also I honestly don't know how Tumblr works nor even have an account, so if Tumblr would work for that please enlighten me :>)
3. How will the 'release' -for the lack of a better term- work?
Will it be one big one with essentially a completed game, or will it be episodic just adding a chapter every so often, or something entirely different?
Critiques (actually just wishes):
1. You have got some incredible art available outside of the game atm, is there a chace it might be added into the game itself in some way or another?
2. I think someone before stated that they were missing audio, which while not needed can add a lot if able to execute well on it. (I'd especially recommend giving the free demo of 'Our Life: Now & Forever' a play, it has really cool dynamic music where I had to scroll up and down -to go back and forth chronologically- to even really notice the layers that started and stopped when for example a character showed up)
But audio is a very hard thing to get right, so my personal opinion -not like it's worth much, just food for thought- would be that having audio is only really worth if it is good enough to support the rest of the experience, which is a-helluva-alotta work.
3. How could you not have had 'Eternity' as a preset name for the MC honestly it writes itself and doesn't even sound bad for a name. :>
All in all I want to say, I think you really got something here and it's a crime that you plan for it to be free.
1. Yes, it is a passion project! A disclaimer that I do truly believe that authors should be compensated for their creative works. It is personally important to me to share my story with as many people as possible. I love reading and writing stories, and I love that everyone and anyone can access them. The downside to this, unfortunately, is that real life distracts me from this passion of mine, even when I want to do nothing but focus on it. The best way would be to find a way to support myself financially, but I'm stubborn about not receiving donations or tips despite paying 50-300% additional commercial fees on all the artwork I commission.
I've really, really thought about using a donation platform in the past, donating a majority of the profits to charities I care about, and keeping as much as I need to cover taxes + pay for a nice cup of coffee. The moment I accept money for this game, though, I really worry that it will change it for me!
2. The discord is closed for now, sorry! I want to make it available when I am more active again.
Tumblr is the best way to keep updated. You don't need an account to view posts, and you can always submit questions anonymously! I post infrequently, but that is the first place I write anything. Check in every few months to see if I say something of note there!
Itch.io is the best for actually content updates since I also write update posts here when anything of substance is added. More insignificant ones or insights to the lore or characters are on the blog.
3. I plan it to release the work on a chapter-basis! On a tangential note, I don't plan on making this a series; I want a complete work that I can keep adding updates towards, similar to the development of Stardew Valley post-release. I hate this comparison since I feel unworthy, but that is the model of development I want to strive towards. Updates until completion, and updates even afterwards!
As for your critiques:
1. You're absolutely right! At the initial release, the codex and stats page were the most rushed aspects that I added as placeholders. The story itself was the focal point. Of course I should've known how important those things were to the experience.
Next time, I will aim to implement the wonderful character art into the game, but I need to really consider how to make a pleasing character and worldbuilding codex!!! That will take me forever.
2. I just answered the previous comment in detail about music with your post in mind! There is definitely a lot to consider regarding actually doing it correctly. When I add it, I will be very careful with it.
3. BAH, so on the nose, but maybe I'll add it just for you!!
Thank you so much for your detailed comment, and I hope I answered it all with as much enthusiasm,Pibk! <3
Yeah I do get that, I feel like once you start accepting money -especially monthly over something like patreon- you start to put yourself under a lot of additional pressure. (Maybe after the release you can make it so it's downloadable on itch and people can donate if they want to :>)
Then I am gonna keep a lookout on Tumblr and maybe you can let us know on there if/when the discord is open again, that'd be great!
A bit of a combination of 'critique' 1&2, I saw in your reply to dollface444 you mentioned you like the differentiation from Visual Novels, which I absolutely get and makes me rethink my previous comment about the art a little.
I mainly made that 'critique', because I confused some characters -not the best at remembering names- in the beginning and a face popping up the first time you see the name could help a lot, especially when you are making choices about their identity right after!
Side note, I love it when people/characters go "BAH, ...." always makes me laugh! But yeah it is very on the nose, but when aren't gods in mythology very on the nose? ;3
And thank you for you very in-depth answer! You answered with great enthusiasm <3
Hi Kuejena! Updates are extremely slow, and I only have myself overthinking about the plot and lore to blame for it!! Thank you so much for the comment!
this is beautiful world-building. would have loved it with music though. it was awfully quiet. I love love love having to use my imagination for most if not all the scenes. The website for your characters are most helpful too! Nice game!
Hi dollface444! Thank you so much for bringing my attention to music. I have thought an inordinate amount about commissioning a composer, but I have reservations. I want a soundtrack that is suited for the long-term without getting grating, and for it to not be too distracting for readers. That requires a lot of consideration!
I had made the decision that it was important it was to me to have a nearly pure text-based IF. I'm a minimalist! Text-based IFs are charming to me; I don't want to detract from what makes it unique from visual novels in the first place. I love pure text interactive fiction because it feels like a book that is "interactive" more than it is a game.
Still, my mind is very open to adding music -- and like I said, I've thought about the idea way more than I'd like. When I change my mind, I will have to credit you for it!!
Please excuse my rambling. I've always wanted to mention it!
I am so glad that there are people who are actually taking a look at the website; I wasn't sure if it was actually very useful, so it's super gratifying to hear you mention it!!
I havent started the first chapter yet, but I can already tell im going to like this game a lot just with the amount of detail im getting in the desc 😭
what a wonderful first chapter, i replayed this now for the 3rd time, simply because i love the entire flow of the story and the world building so much! i really cant wait for more :3
l0rnia, I am so stunned!! I can hardly sift through my own writing, so it's amazing to hear you sat through it three times, that's just! Thank you so much for loving my work and for supporting me, I hope you'll continue to keep an eye out!
I adore the world you've painted for us! Very clever, and the options are very varied and encompassing! Beautiful story-telling! I love each character introduced so far- so excited for whatever direction you take!
Hi w6rm! Thank you so much for taking the time to let me know your thoughts — I'm so delighted that you think that the options are varied and that you loved the storytelling and characters! Those are definitely the main things I'm looking out for. Thank you again and I hope you'll continue to stay updated!
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This is amazing!!! Powerfully written, it draws you in and won’t let go. I loved how the LGBTQIA+ characters and families are portrayed as normal, rather than something to get hung up on. It gave me hope, so thank you for that. I can't wait for more!! (I mean, I can, don't burn yourself out, but I’ll be waiting with bated breath.)
Hi Hopelight2000! Thank you so much for the kind words about the writing!!
I've been so entrenched into LGBTQIA+ media, that the overwhelmingly positive response to the "gay dads" and similar genuinely baffled me! For all the inclusivity and diversity within interactive fiction, the community is both very progressive but also flawed. I am very happy that readers adore that characters are naturally and casually queer in my story, as much as it saddens me that it's not more common!
I'd written paragraphs more, but I will stop myself here, haha! :) I have a lot of thoughts on the story's setting and its attitude towards gender and sexuality, but I'll keep those for a future date.
Thank you so much for supporting my work! I would love nothing more but to please you with another update, believe me!! Much love!
I keep telling myself, stop playing the in-development ones, they're too good. Did I listen? No, of course not, don't ever take my advice (there's a little paradox for you). This has one of the deepest stories of all the interactive fiction games I've ever played, and that is quite the achievement. Your work is absolutely brilliant, author, and I give a massive round of applause for everyone who contributed!
Hi Egel_Wegel! I am very sorry to have been a source of great distress to you -- I personally barely have the heart and stomach to support WIPs but end up getting swept into it anyway...!
I truly appreciate all your kind works, and that is such extremely high flattery that I struggle to believe you on it! Cheers!
Ha! If you doubt yourself, maybe I should post some of my work just to show you a comparison! This game is awesome, also don't worry about distressing me lol, I'm always over it in two minutes and eagerly awaiting the rest of the story :]
Haihai,
what a great start to a story, I enjoyed it a lot and am figuratively starving for more :> -insert a whole bunch of raving about all the great things people before me have already pointed out-
I have a few questions and "critiques" after that (more like minor wishes).
Questions:
1. "This game will be free to play in its entirety" - I assume this is a passion project of yours, is / will there be any way to support you?
Whether that be financially, with art or fan-art, maybe even emotionally showing support.
(I wouldn't even know how to 'donate' here on itch without the download popup, which is not on your site)
2. Is there any way to keep updated with the progress and/or release notifications/reminders?
(I tried joining the discord but the link seems to be dead, also I honestly don't know how Tumblr works nor even have an account, so if Tumblr would work for that please enlighten me :>)
3. How will the 'release' -for the lack of a better term- work?
Will it be one big one with essentially a completed game, or will it be episodic just adding a chapter every so often, or something entirely different?
Critiques (actually just wishes):
1. You have got some incredible art available outside of the game atm, is there a chace it might be added into the game itself in some way or another?
2. I think someone before stated that they were missing audio, which while not needed can add a lot if able to execute well on it. (I'd especially recommend giving the free demo of 'Our Life: Now & Forever' a play, it has really cool dynamic music where I had to scroll up and down -to go back and forth chronologically- to even really notice the layers that started and stopped when for example a character showed up)
But audio is a very hard thing to get right, so my personal opinion -not like it's worth much, just food for thought- would be that having audio is only really worth if it is good enough to support the rest of the experience, which is a-helluva-alotta work.
3. How could you not have had 'Eternity' as a preset name for the MC honestly it writes itself and doesn't even sound bad for a name. :>
All in all I want to say, I think you really got something here and it's a crime that you plan for it to be free.
As for your questions;
1. Yes, it is a passion project! A disclaimer that I do truly believe that authors should be compensated for their creative works. It is personally important to me to share my story with as many people as possible. I love reading and writing stories, and I love that everyone and anyone can access them. The downside to this, unfortunately, is that real life distracts me from this passion of mine, even when I want to do nothing but focus on it. The best way would be to find a way to support myself financially, but I'm stubborn about not receiving donations or tips despite paying 50-300% additional commercial fees on all the artwork I commission.
I've really, really thought about using a donation platform in the past, donating a majority of the profits to charities I care about, and keeping as much as I need to cover taxes + pay for a nice cup of coffee. The moment I accept money for this game, though, I really worry that it will change it for me!
2. The discord is closed for now, sorry! I want to make it available when I am more active again.
Tumblr is the best way to keep updated. You don't need an account to view posts, and you can always submit questions anonymously! I post infrequently, but that is the first place I write anything. Check in every few months to see if I say something of note there!
Itch.io is the best for actually content updates since I also write update posts here when anything of substance is added. More insignificant ones or insights to the lore or characters are on the blog.
3. I plan it to release the work on a chapter-basis! On a tangential note, I don't plan on making this a series; I want a complete work that I can keep adding updates towards, similar to the development of Stardew Valley post-release. I hate this comparison since I feel unworthy, but that is the model of development I want to strive towards. Updates until completion, and updates even afterwards!
As for your critiques:
1. You're absolutely right! At the initial release, the codex and stats page were the most rushed aspects that I added as placeholders. The story itself was the focal point. Of course I should've known how important those things were to the experience.
Next time, I will aim to implement the wonderful character art into the game, but I need to really consider how to make a pleasing character and worldbuilding codex!!! That will take me forever.
2. I just answered the previous comment in detail about music with your post in mind! There is definitely a lot to consider regarding actually doing it correctly. When I add it, I will be very careful with it.
3. BAH, so on the nose, but maybe I'll add it just for you!!
Thank you so much for your detailed comment, and I hope I answered it all with as much enthusiasm,Pibk! <3
Thank you for your answer!
Yeah I do get that, I feel like once you start accepting money -especially monthly over something like patreon- you start to put yourself under a lot of additional pressure. (Maybe after the release you can make it so it's downloadable on itch and people can donate if they want to :>)
Then I am gonna keep a lookout on Tumblr and maybe you can let us know on there if/when the discord is open again, that'd be great!
A bit of a combination of 'critique' 1&2, I saw in your reply to dollface444 you mentioned you like the differentiation from Visual Novels, which I absolutely get and makes me rethink my previous comment about the art a little.
I mainly made that 'critique', because I confused some characters -not the best at remembering names- in the beginning and a face popping up the first time you see the name could help a lot, especially when you are making choices about their identity right after!
Side note, I love it when people/characters go "BAH, ...." always makes me laugh! But yeah it is very on the nose, but when aren't gods in mythology very on the nose? ;3
And thank you for you very in-depth answer! You answered with great enthusiasm <3
I wonder if this story will get any more updates, I really hope so!
Hi Kuejena! Updates are extremely slow, and I only have myself overthinking about the plot and lore to blame for it!! Thank you so much for the comment!
Haven't started to play yet but I know I'll love it already !!
You make me nervous!! Please let me know if you ever got a chance to read it!
I did ! It's amazing, I absolutely love the writing !! I've played many times since then
this is beautiful world-building. would have loved it with music though. it was awfully quiet. I love love love having to use my imagination for most if not all the scenes. The website for your characters are most helpful too! Nice game!
Hi dollface444! Thank you so much for bringing my attention to music. I have thought an inordinate amount about commissioning a composer, but I have reservations. I want a soundtrack that is suited for the long-term without getting grating, and for it to not be too distracting for readers. That requires a lot of consideration!
I had made the decision that it was important it was to me to have a nearly pure text-based IF. I'm a minimalist! Text-based IFs are charming to me; I don't want to detract from what makes it unique from visual novels in the first place. I love pure text interactive fiction because it feels like a book that is "interactive" more than it is a game.
Still, my mind is very open to adding music -- and like I said, I've thought about the idea way more than I'd like. When I change my mind, I will have to credit you for it!!
Please excuse my rambling. I've always wanted to mention it!
I am so glad that there are people who are actually taking a look at the website; I wasn't sure if it was actually very useful, so it's super gratifying to hear you mention it!!
Thank you again for the lovely lovely comment!
this if is soo good holy. Also in love with Ciocana
Thank you so much, Bat -- and join the club, haha!!
I havent started the first chapter yet, but I can already tell im going to like this game a lot just with the amount of detail im getting in the desc 😭
Haha you can't say that without having played it yet!! Please let me know what you thought of it when you get a chance! 🫶
what an amazing prologue!! the writing is stupendous, and the story is ever interesting and intriguing !! <33
Thank you thank you thank you so much, hamgyuus!!!
what a wonderful first chapter, i replayed this now for the 3rd time, simply because i love the entire flow of the story and the world building so much! i really cant wait for more :3
l0rnia, I am so stunned!! I can hardly sift through my own writing, so it's amazing to hear you sat through it three times, that's just! Thank you so much for loving my work and for supporting me, I hope you'll continue to keep an eye out!
Geeeee Love it！！！😍your writing style is AWSOME！
Yuuxiiii thank you so so much for your enthusiasm I love it!!! I am so happy you like my writing!
My reminder to go play it lol >-<
remember to read it
Remember to read it and let me know your thoughts! :) Thank you so much for considering my work!
I adore the world you've painted for us! Very clever, and the options are very varied and encompassing! Beautiful story-telling! I love each character introduced so far- so excited for whatever direction you take!
Thank you!
Hi w6rm! Thank you so much for taking the time to let me know your thoughts — I'm so delighted that you think that the options are varied and that you loved the storytelling and characters! Those are definitely the main things I'm looking out for. Thank you again and I hope you'll continue to stay updated!